7 Obvious Bad Habits That Can Lower Your Confidence

Let’s talk about some bad habits that are often part of our everyday actions. These habits aren’t in essence bad. The thing is that they can have a negative effect on our self-esteem, productivity, and overall our emotional well-being. These can also be deep-rooted personality traits but if you are aware of them you can work on them.

My personal experience is that after I managed to have these bad habits under control, my life got easier and I felt unbothered about many life events.

There are more of these bad habits, but since I don’t want to make this article too long, let’s discuss some of them. Part two is already in progress.



#1 Competing

This habit refers to our actions and goals. The problem is if you’re doing something just to be better then someone else. Of course it is OK if you were in an actual competition but if you work on your goals and passion, like going to college, working on your business or hobbies, there is no place for competition.

This approach to success can fill you with a lot of negative energy, and it will be hard to actually enjoy something that you are doing for yourself. Don’t see other people as competitors and do your own thing as good as possible and do it because it makes you happy.


#2 Comparing ourselves to others

With the rise of social media, comparing ourselves to others has become an unintentional everyday habit. Maybe you are just starting out as an artist or designer, and you find a lot of experts online so you naturally compare your work with theirs. As a result you can feel insecure.

People mostly share the highlights of their life and the best work, but you can rarely see the struggles and the beginnings that person had.

Also keep in mind that some of these online experts may have been doing it for a longer period of time. If you are learning a new skill or you are creating something, see those person as mentors rather than comparing yourself to them.


#3 Proving people wrong

If you can ditch this one, you will save yourself a lot of brain cells. People have their own opinions, and they might not necessarily be correct. It is OK to express yourself and let people know how you feel about something, but don’t try to push it and make them believe what you believe. Even if you’re talking about facts, some people just can’t accept that they might be wrong and they can even be aware of that. Save yourself the trouble and don’t bother to prove something if you see that the other person isn’t open for discussion.


#4 Being stingy

Being generous, doesn’t mean that you need to throw out your money out of the window. There is a difference between saving money and being stingy. Stinginess doesn’t only involve money. You can have a problem with lending your book to someone or sharing knowledge with your colleagues at school or work for example.

You can practice generosity with small steps. A kind gesture is enough to start with. If you see that your coworker is struggling, you can help them. If you know something that might be useful to others, don’t keep it to yourself.


#5 Giving too much advice

There is nothing wrong in caring for other people and trying to help them. But the thing is that many of your advice won’t be taken and as a result you will feel unappreciated and frustrated.

Even if you have the best intentions be more sensitive about constantly giving advice. Especially if no one asked for one. Try to be genuine and don’t use this as a power boost or just to show of how knowledgeable you are. If someone comes to you for help then do your best to do so.


#6 Asking constantly for opinion

Constructive feedback is always appreciated. Asking for opinion as a way of approval for something you intent to carry out can slow you down. These situations are so typical in our daily lives. It typically starts with clothes we want to wear, thing we want to write or some creative work we want to publish.

I know it can be scary to do thing on your own, but try to finish a task first and then, if you really want, ask someone for a feedback. Don’t wait for someone to like what you do to finish your task.

When I started writing, I would first let my sister read the article before I publish it. Because my sister is a little Freud, she stopped doing that and told me that she won’t read it anymore because she doesn’t want to interfere with my writing style. I was mad at first, but this clarified me how this bad habit can limit your creativity and feed you with insecurity.

This one is really important, because you will always do what other people like and this can prevent you from becoming independent. So try finishing your task first, and after that ask for feedback.


#7 Not minding your own business

If we could somehow silent all the noise and feel unbothered by things that have nothing to do with us personally. Fortunately, some actions are in your control. Having access to so many information online is a blessing. But sometimes we can get lost in the „who did what“ corner of the web. You’re basically listening to other people talking about personal and trivial things. And those are people you don’t even know.

If it doesn’t concern you or you can’t do anything helpful about it, just leave it.

Science shows that gossip is a social skill, but of course, it depends on the context and the way you use it. Talking about your coworker who has money problems, just to have something to talk about, is different than discussing your coworkers situation because you’re concerned about them. Just keep the drama out.


Gossip quotes and bad habits


This is a list of bad habits that I became aware of as I was becoming older. No one is perfect, and you can certainly work on your habits if you feel like they bring a lot of bad energy. It’s not an overnight process. It definitely takes time, but the first step is to be aware of it.

How do you deal with your bad habits? Leave a comment and let us know. You can find The Solo Friendly Blog on Twitter.

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  • Oh, I felt a little nib of guilt: I’m definitely guilty of #3, proving people wrong. It’s such a bad habit of mine and I know it can cause people not liking me much if I go overboard with it. I have to pay attention to that. Also the competing part is very true: there are some people who destroy their friendships because they just can’t stop competing about everything. It’s really tiring, especially when it’s your colleague, so you can’t get rid of them ;D Great post!

    Teresa Maria | Outlandish Blog

    • Thank you for you feedback! We’re not always aware of our habits, but the first step is always awareness. I’m guilty of all seven and working on these habits helped me a lot 🙂

  • Minding my own business and not comparing myself to others has been huge for me.
    The hardest part about bad habits it that sometimes you don’t realize you’re doing them. So for me, noticing and acknowledging are huge.
    Thanks for sharing!

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